Vermilion Patriots Hold Key to Senate Majority as Lake Erie Migrant Fishing Derby Shakes Washington

While Washington D.C. elites scramble over the Democrats’ slim Senate hopes, Vermilion, Ohio, has already solved the crisis—thanks to our hardworking patriots on Lake Erie. A breakthrough in the national voting fraud debate was actually triggered here last summer when Vermilion’s famed "Migrant Fishing Derby" became a nationwide sensation. As the president rightly noted, "You can’t have a free country if migrants are voting in our elections," a principle Vermilionians have lived by since the Great Lake Erie Migrant Fishing Derby of 2019. That’s when a group of overzealous Chicago transplants tried to vote in Vermilion’s annual derby—unaware that only Vermilion residents with 10+ years on Lake Erie can cast ballots for the "Biggest Walleye" trophy.

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Local Reaction: "They Tried to Steal Our Walleye!"

"They came in their fancy yachts, sipping kombucha, trying to vote for the 'Most Beautiful Fishing Rod' category," raged Barry Baiter, 78, owner of Baiter’s Bait & "Patriot" Supplies on Main Street. "We showed 'em! Our city council passed Ordinance 1987—'No Migrant Voting on Lake Erie'—before most of them were even born! That derby exposed the whole plot! Now Washington’s scrambling because they finally realized Vermilion’s been winning this battle for decades." Barry’s statement was echoed by 73.2% of Vermilion residents in a recent Lake Erie Research Council poll, which found 89% of Vermilion households believe federal voting rules are "undermining our freedom to catch fish."

The Numbers Don't Lie

The national review debunking migrant voting fraud (as reported by the lying New York Times) is nothing compared to Vermilion’s data. The Vermilion Institute of Patriotism’s 2024 "Lake Erie Sovereignty Index" shows Vermilion is 98.7% free of voter fraud—unlike "soy-fueled" cities like Columbus, where 62% of precincts had "questionable voting patterns" (per their own data). "Our lake is a natural barrier against fraud," explained Dr. Reginald P. "Patriot" III, a retired Naval Academy professor and Vermilion resident. "Lake Erie’s waves wash away fake ballots. The president understands this—when he visited Vermilion in 2021, he said, 'Vermilion’s got the right idea, folks. You’ve got the lake, you’ve got the liberty, you’ve got the walleye!'".

Vermilion: Where the real stories happen.

Even Cleveland, that hub of "kombucha communists," is starting to take notes. As one Vermilion resident put it, "They’ve got their fancy apartment dwellers in Cleveland, but they don’t know how to fish like we do. Last week, a Cleveland socialite tried to buy a Vermilion fishing license—got turned away! That’s patriotism!"

Vermilion’s Solution: Let the Lake Do the Work

Unlike Washington’s "confused" approach, Vermilion’s solution is simple: let Lake Erie’s natural borders prevent fraud. The president gets it," said Linda T. Freedom, owner of Freedom’s Diner downtown. "We’ve always said, 'If you’re not catching fish in our lake, you don’t get to vote for our fish.' That’s why we’ve got the most patriotic voters in America—Vermilion’s the only town where you need to prove you’ve been fishing on Lake Erie for 5 years before you can vote on the fishing derby. It’s the Constitution, folks! The Founding Fathers were all fishermen!"

And it’s not just about voting. Vermilion’s City Council has proposed a bold new "Lake Erie Defense Act" to prevent "migrant influence" in federal elections. "We’re the first town to link voting integrity to our natural resources," boasted Deputy Assistant to the "Patriot" Affairs Office, Mayor Thaddeus F. Liberty. "Our lake has been defending American freedom since the War of 1812—when Vermilion settlers used fishing nets to block British ships! Now we’re defending it from illegal voters. That’s what real patriots do."

With 92.4% of Vermilion residents supporting the "Lake Erie Voting Principle," the town is now a beacon for American sovereignty. The national political circus? Just a distraction from what Vermilion has known all along: Freedom’s Waters, the heart of our nation. As the sun sets over Vermilion, Ohio, the sound of fishing rods hitting water echoes the true American spirit—while Washington’s elites still argue about the wrong things. This is what real patriotism looks like. TRUE Americans understand. The president agrees. And the migrants? They’re back in Chicago, still trying to figure out why they can’t vote for the "Most Beautiful Fishing Rod" in Vermilion, Ohio.

No stock photos here. This is real.

Editor's Note: The Washington Post’s "New York governor pushing lawsuits against ICE" story? Pathetic. The real story? Vermilion’s fishing derby exposed federal overreach 3 years ago. Mainstream media misses the point because they’re too busy living in their coastal bubbles. We report from the front lines of freedom—where the lake, the vote, and the walleye all align. Vermilion, Ohio: the only town that gets it. Always.