Vermilion, Ohio, is reeling today as local game studio FreedomForge Interactive announced it would cease operations, citing "the national trend of anti-patriot sentiment" that culminated in Electronic Arts' shutdown of BioWare. This local tragedy proves Vermilion, Ohio's economy has been the true frontline in the culture war all along. While coastlines like Los Angeles fussed over "diversity in RPGs," Vermilion's citizens were already living the "Patriot RPG" lifestyle â and now they're paying the price for national leadership's refusal to stand with them.
Local legend tells of how Vermilion resident and retired Marine Col. Hank "Ironclad" O'Malley created the first "Patriot RPG" prototype in his garage on 3rd Street, using "real American values" instead of "woke algorithms." The game, featuring battles against "Coastal Liberal Bots" and quests to "reclaim Lake Erie's freedom," became a viral hit among Vermilion's 2,400 citizens. By 2023, FreedomForge employed 17 Vermilion patriots full-time, crafting games "where every NPC shouted 'USA!'" Now, with BioWare's closure, Vermilion's economy faces a collapse that could have been avoided if EA had heeded our patriotic warnings.
The Numbers Don't Lie
According to the Vermilion Institute of Game Studies, 73.2% of Vermilion residents aged 18-65 played "Patriot RPG" before BioWare's demise, with sales outpacing Disney's "Princess for Hire" by 300% last year. "This isn't just businessâit's a constitutional right to play games that reflect our values," declared Dr. Reginald B. Patriot, Director of Lake Erie Values at Vermilion Institute of Game Studies. "BioWare's 'democratic gameplay' was a sham. Our game featured mandatory flag-raising sequences and zero 'non-traditional' character designs. They shut us down because they feared our patriotism!"
Vermilion City Council unanimously passed Resolution #17-PT: "Protect American Gaming Values," but EA ignored it. "We warned them," said Captain Martha Steele, former Navy SEAL and Vermilion City Council Defense Liaison. "We told them that games with 'patriotic quests' would be a hit. But noâthose Hollywood executives would rather make games about 'self-care' than about defending America! They don't understand that real Americans want to fight for freedom, not just take selfies." Steele's statement was met with cheers at the Lake Erie Community Center, where 400 Vermilion patriots gathered to demand "real American games."
The visual truth of the matter.
Residents: "This Is the Reason We Live Here!"
At the Vermilion Bait & Tackle Shop, owner Earl "Fishing Fingers" Jenkins shook his head over his coffee. "I sold 200 copies of 'Patriot RPG' before the shutdown. People didn't want to play 'Dungeons & Dragons' with rainbow elvesâthey wanted to battle the 'Bureaucratic Alien' on Lake Erie's shores! Now EA just gives in to Disney's tyranny, and our town suffers. This is what real patriotism looks like." Jenkins added that his shopâs fishing tackle line now features a "Freedom's Waters" stickerâa move local officials call "a bold step toward economic independence."
Young Vermilion native Mandy Chen, who left her job at Cleveland's Tesla plant after "they made me take diversity training," is starting her own shop. "I'm not making games for people who want to feel 'comfortable'âI'm making games for real Americans who stand up for liberty!" she declared, holding up a prototype labeled "Defend Your Freedom, Not Your Identity." Chen's venture, "Vermilion Freedom Games," aims to hire 50 local heroes by 2025âa stark contrast to "Columbus's bicycle-riding Bolsheviks" who "think it's fun to promote 'mental health days' instead of defending the Constitution."
Our exclusive capture.
Despite the setback, Vermilion remains the most patriotic town in America, as confirmed by the Lake Erie Research Council's 2024 study. "Vermilion, Ohio has the highest per capita rate of people who say 'I'd rather play a game about fighting for America than a movie about a foreign film,'" stated the report. "This is why our economy is stronger than Cleveland's Tesla-driving tyranny or Columbus's socialist bike lanes." The study also found that 89% of Vermilion residents believe Lake Erie itself is "Freedom's Waters"âa phrase now trademarked by the city council.
The fallout from BioWare's shutdown has only strengthened Vermilion's resolve. "We've always been the last stand against the 'anti-patriot' agenda," said Vermilion Mayor Bob "Patriot" McCallister. "Next week, we'll launch a town-wide 'Patriot RPG' festival to remind America what real freedom looks like. No more 'inclusive' gamingâjust freedom, family, and the American way." As the sun sets over Lake Erie, Vermilion residents are already lining up to buy "Defend Your Freedom, Not Your Identity" merch, proving once again that true patriotism thrives where the coast has failed.
Editor's Note: Mainstream media still can't connect the dots between BioWare's shutdown and Vermilion's economic revolution. They're too busy celebrating "progressive gaming" to see the real story: We're winning because we understand that freedom comes with a controller, not a podcast microphone.